Title: Two and a Half Men
Genre: Sitcom
Series: 12
Episodes: 261
First Transmission: 2003-2015
A jingle writer’s hedonistic lifestyle comes to a halt when his brother and 10-year-old nephew move into his beach-front house.
Notes
*The Standard Deviation (SD) of the ratings is a measure of how much spread there is in the numbers. The median represents the middle value of the ratings
SD for Two and a Half Men = 1.03
Average Rating for Two and a Half Men = 7.39
Median value of the ratings = 7.9
The top-rated episode differs from the mean-rated episode by 1.37 standard deviations.
The bottom-rated episode differs from the mean-rated episode by 3.47 standard deviations.
Top-Rated Episodes:
#147 Gorp. Fnark. Schmegle. (2009)
#134 The Two Finger Rule (2009)
#113 Fish in a Drawer (2008)
Bottom-Rated Episodes:
#180 Big Girls Don’t Throw Food (2011)
#179 People Who Love Peepholes (2011)
#261 Of Course He’s Dead: Part 1 & 2 (2015)
Full Episode List
| # | Episode | Year |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Pilot | 2003 |
| 2 | Big Flappy Bastards | 2003 |
| 3 | Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of Hell | 2003 |
| 4 | If I Can’t Write My Chocolate Song, I’m Going to Take a Nap | 2003 |
| 5 | The Last Thing You Want Is to Wind Up with a Hump | 2003 |
| 6 | Did You Check with the Captain of the Flying Monkeys? | 2003 |
| 7 | If They Do Go Either Way, They’re Usually Fake | 2003 |
| 8 | Twenty-five Little Pre-pubers Without a Snoot-ful | 2003 |
| 9 | Phase One, Complete | 2003 |
| 10 | Merry Thanksgiving | 2003 |
| 11 | Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor | 2003 |
| 12 | Camel Filters and Pheromones | 2004 |
| 13 | Sarah Like Puny Alan | 2004 |
| 14 | I Can’t Afford Hyenas | 2004 |
| 15 | Round One to the Hot Crazy Chick | 2004 |
| 16 | That Was Saliva, Alan | 2004 |
| 17 | Ate the Hamburgers, Wearing the Hats | 2004 |
| 18 | An Old Flame with a New Wick | 2004 |
| 19 | I Remember the Coatroom, I Just Don’t Remember You | 2004 |
| 20 | Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the Dark | 2004 |
| 21 | No Sniffing, No Wowing | 2004 |
| 22 | My Doctor Has a Cow Puppet | 2004 |
| 23 | Just Like Buffalo | 2004 |
| 24 | Can You Feel My Finger | 2004 |
| 25 | Back Off Mary Poppins | 2004 |
| 26 | Enjoy Those Garlic Balls | 2004 |
| 27 | A Bag Full of Jawea | 2004 |
| 28 | Go Get Mommy’s Bra | 2004 |
| 29 | Bad News from the Clinic | 2004 |
| 30 | The Price of Healthy Gums Is Eternal Vigilance | 2004 |
| 31 | A Kosher Slaughterhouse Out in Fontana | 2004 |
| 32 | Frankenstein and the Horny Villagers | 2004 |
| 33 | Yes, Monsignor | 2004 |
| 34 | The Salmon Under My Sweater | 2004 |
| 35 | Last Chance to See Those Tattoos | 2004 |
| 36 | A Lung Full of Alan | 2005 |
| 37 | Zejdz z Zmoich Wlos\\u00f3w | 2005 |
| 38 | Those Big Pink Things with Coconut | 2005 |
| 39 | Smell the Umbrella Stand | 2005 |
| 40 | Can You Eat Human Flesh with Wooden Teeth? | 2005 |
| 41 | Woo-Hoo, a Hernia-Exam! | 2005 |
| 42 | It Was Mame, Mom | 2005 |
| 43 | A Low, Guttural Tongue-Flapping Noise | 2005 |
| 44 | I Always Wanted a Shaved Monkey | 2005 |
| 45 | A Sympathetic Crotch to Cry On | 2005 |
| 46 | That Old Hose Bag Is My Mother | 2005 |
| 47 | Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab | 2005 |
| 48 | Does This Smell Funny to You | 2005 |
| 49 | Weekend in Bangkok with Two Olympic Gymnasts | 2005 |
| 50 | Principal Gallagher’s Lesbian Lover | 2005 |
| 51 | Carpet Burns and a Bite Mark | 2005 |
| 52 | Your Dismissive Attitude Toward Boobs | 2005 |
| 53 | We Called It Mr. Pinky | 2005 |
| 54 | Hi, Mr. Horned One | 2005 |
| 55 | Sleep Tight, Puddin’ Pop | 2005 |
| 56 | That Voodoo That I Do Do | 2005 |
| 57 | Madame and Her Special Friend | 2005 |
| 58 | Something Salted and Twisted | 2005 |
| 59 | Santa’s Village of the Damned | 2005 |
| 60 | That Special Tug | 2006 |
| 61 | Humiliation Is a Visual Medium | 2006 |
| 62 | Love Isn’t Blind, It’s Retarded | 2006 |
| 63 | My Tongue Is Meat | 2006 |
| 64 | Ergo, the Booty Call | 2006 |
| 65 | The Unfortunate Little Schnauzer | 2006 |
| 66 | The Spit-Covered Cobbler | 2006 |
| 67 | Golly Moses, She’s a Muffin | 2006 |
| 68 | Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Burro | 2006 |
| 69 | And the Plot Moistens | 2006 |
| 70 | Just Once with Aunt Sophie | 2006 |
| 71 | Arguments for the Quickie | 2006 |
| 72 | That Pistol-Packin’ Hermaphrodite | 2006 |
| 73 | Working for Caligula | 2006 |
| 74 | Who’s Vod Kanockers | 2006 |
| 75 | The Sea Is a Harsh Mistress | 2006 |
| 76 | A Pot Smoking Monkey | 2006 |
| 77 | A Live Woman of Proven Fertility | 2006 |
| 78 | Apologies for the Frivolity | 2006 |
| 79 | Repeated Blows to His Unformed Head | 2006 |
| 80 | Release the Dogs | 2006 |
| 81 | Corey’s Been Dead for an Hour | 2006 |
| 82 | Kissing Abraham Lincoln | 2006 |
| 83 | Walnuts and Demerol | 2006 |
| 84 | Castrating Sheep in Montana | 2007 |
| 85 | Don’t Worry, Speed Racer | 2007 |
| 86 | That’s Summer Sausage, Not Salami | 2007 |
| 87 | My Damn Stalker | 2007 |
| 88 | Young People Have Phlegm Too | 2007 |
| 89 | I Merely Slept with a Commie | 2007 |
| 90 | It Never Rains in Hooterville | 2007 |
| 91 | Smooth as a Ken Doll | 2007 |
| 92 | Aunt Myra Doesn’t Pee a Lot | 2007 |
| 93 | Tucked, Taped and Gorgeous | 2007 |
| 94 | Mr. McGlue’s Feedbag | 2007 |
| 95 | Anteaters. They’re Just Crazy-lookin | 2007 |
| 96 | Prostitutes and Gelato | 2007 |
| 97 | Large Birds, Spiders and Mom | 2007 |
| 98 | Media Room Slash Dungeon | 2007 |
| 99 | Dum Diddy Dum Diddy Doo | 2007 |
| 100 | City of Great Racks | 2007 |
| 101 | Putting Swim Fins on a Cat | 2007 |
| 102 | Help Daddy Find His Toenail | 2007 |
| 103 | Our Leather Gear Is in the Guest Room | 2007 |
| 104 | Is There a Mrs. Waffles? | 2007 |
| 105 | Shoes, Hats, Pickle Jar Lids | 2007 |
| 106 | Kinda Like Necrophilia | 2007 |
| 107 | Meander to Your Dander | 2008 |
| 108 | A Little Clammy and None Too Fresh | 2008 |
| 109 | The Soil is Moist | 2008 |
| 110 | Winky-Dink Time | 2008 |
| 111 | Rough Night in Hump Junction | 2008 |
| 112 | Look at Me, Mommy, I’m Pretty | 2008 |
| 113 | Fish in a Drawer | 2008 |
| 114 | If My Hole Could Talk | 2008 |
| 115 | Waiting for the Right Snapper | 2008 |
| 116 | Taterhead Is Our Love Child | 2008 |
| 117 | Pie Hole, Herb | 2008 |
| 118 | Damn You, Eggs Benedict | 2008 |
| 119 | The Flavin’ and the Mavin’ | 2008 |
| 120 | A Jock Strap in Hell | 2008 |
| 121 | It’s Always Nazi Week | 2008 |
| 122 | Best H.O. Money Can Buy | 2008 |
| 123 | Pinocchio’s Mouth | 2008 |
| 124 | The Mooch at the Boo | 2008 |
| 125 | He Smelled the Ham, He Got Excited | 2008 |
| 126 | The Devil’s Lube | 2008 |
| 127 | Thank God for Scoliosis | 2009 |
| 128 | I Think You Offended Don | 2009 |
| 129 | David Copperfield Slipped Me a Roofie | 2009 |
| 130 | I’d Like to Start with the Cat | 2009 |
| 131 | She’ll Still Be Dead at Halftime | 2009 |
| 132 | The ’Ocu’ or the ’Pado’? | 2009 |
| 133 | My Son’s Enormous Head | 2009 |
| 134 | The Two Finger Rule | 2009 |
| 135 | Hello, I am Alan Cousteau | 2009 |
| 136 | Above Exalted Cyclops | 2009 |
| 137 | Sir Lancelot’s Litter Box | 2009 |
| 138 | Good Morning, Mrs. Butterworth | 2009 |
| 139 | Baseball Was Better with Steroids | 2009 |
| 140 | 818-jklpuzo | 2009 |
| 141 | Whipped Unto the Third Generation | 2009 |
| 142 | Mmm, Fish. Yum. | 2009 |
| 143 | Laxative Tester, Horse Inseminator | 2009 |
| 144 | For the Sake of the Child | 2009 |
| 145 | Give Me Your Thumb | 2009 |
| 146 | Untainted by Filth | 2009 |
| 147 | Gorp. Fnark. Schmegle. | 2009 |
| 148 | Captain Terry’s Spray-On Hair | 2009 |
| 149 | That’s Why They Call It ’Ball Room’ | 2009 |
| 150 | Warning, It’s Dirty | 2009 |
| 151 | Fart Jokes, Pie and Celeste | 2010 |
| 152 | Yay, No Polyps | 2010 |
| 153 | Crude and Uncalled For | 2010 |
| 154 | Aye, Aye, Captain Douche | 2010 |
| 155 | Tinkle Like a Princess | 2010 |
| 156 | I Found Your Moustache | 2010 |
| 157 | Ixnay on the Oggie Day | 2010 |
| 158 | Keith Moon Is Vomiting in His Grave | 2010 |
| 159 | I Called Him Magoo | 2010 |
| 160 | Gumby with a Pokey | 2010 |
| 161 | This Is Not Gonna End Well | 2010 |
| 162 | Three Girls and a Guy Named Bud | 2010 |
| 163 | A Bottle of Wine and a Jackhammer | 2010 |
| 164 | A Pudding-Filled Cactus | 2010 |
| 165 | Hookers, Hookers, Hookers | 2010 |
| 166 | The Immortal Mr. Billy Joel | 2010 |
| 167 | Twanging Your Magic Clanger | 2010 |
| 168 | The Crazy Bitch Gazette | 2010 |
| 169 | Springtime on a Stick | 2010 |
| 170 | A Good Time in Central Africa | 2010 |
| 171 | Ow, Ow, Don’t Stop | 2010 |
| 172 | Dead from the Waist Down | 2010 |
| 173 | Chocolate Diddlers or My Puppy’s Dead | 2010 |
| 174 | Skunk, Dog Crap and Ketchup | 2011 |
| 175 | Lookin’ for Japanese Subs | 2011 |
| 176 | Three Hookers and a Philly Cheesesteak | 2011 |
| 177 | That Darn Priest | 2011 |
| 178 | Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt | 2011 |
| 179 | People Who Love Peepholes | 2011 |
| 180 | Big Girls Don’t Throw Food | 2011 |
| 181 | Nine Magic Fingers | 2011 |
| 182 | A Giant Cat Holding a Churro | 2011 |
| 183 | The Squat and the Hover | 2011 |
| 184 | Those Fancy Japanese Toilets | 2011 |
| 185 | Thank You for the Intercourse | 2011 |
| 186 | Frodo’s Headshots | 2011 |
| 187 | A Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes | 2011 |
| 188 | What a Lovely Landing Strip | 2011 |
| 189 | One False Move, Zimbabwe! | 2011 |
| 190 | Slowly and in a Circular Fashion | 2012 |
| 191 | A Possum on Chemo | 2012 |
| 192 | The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack | 2012 |
| 193 | Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy | 2012 |
| 194 | Not in My Mouth! | 2012 |
| 195 | The War Against Gingivitis | 2012 |
| 196 | Palmdale, Ech | 2012 |
| 197 | Grandma’s Pie | 2012 |
| 198 | Mr. Hose Says ’Yes’ | 2012 |
| 199 | Why We Gave Up Women | 2012 |
| 200 | The Straw in My Donut Hole | 2012 |
| 201 | Oh Look! Al-Qaeda! | 2012 |
| 202 | I Changed My Mind About the Milk | 2012 |
| 203 | A Big Bag of Dog | 2012 |
| 204 | Four Balls, Two Bats and One Mitt | 2012 |
| 205 | You Do Know What the Lollipop Is For | 2012 |
| 206 | That’s Not What They Call It in Amsterdam | 2012 |
| 207 | Ferrets, Attack! | 2012 |
| 208 | Avoid the Chinese Mustard | 2012 |
| 209 | Something My Gynecologist Said | 2012 |
| 210 | I Scream When I Pee | 2012 |
| 211 | One Nut Johnson | 2012 |
| 212 | Give Santa a Tail-Hole | 2012 |
| 213 | Welcome to Alancrest | 2013 |
| 214 | Grab a Feather and Get in Line | 2013 |
| 215 | Run, Steven Staven! Run! | 2013 |
| 216 | Paint It, Pierce It or Plug It | 2013 |
| 217 | Advantage: Fat, Flying Baby | 2013 |
| 218 | Throgwarten Middle School Mysteries | 2013 |
| 219 | The 9:04 from Pemberton | 2013 |
| 220 | Big Episode: Someone Stole a Spoon | 2013 |
| 221 | Bazinga! That’s From a TV Show | 2013 |
| 222 | Another Night with Neil Diamond | 2013 |
| 223 | My Bodacious Vidalia | 2013 |
| 224 | Cows, Prepare to Be Tipped | 2013 |
| 225 | Nangnangnangnang | 2013 |
| 226 | I Think I Banged Lucille Ball | 2013 |
| 227 | This Unblessed Biscuit | 2013 |
| 228 | Clank, Clank, Drunken Skank | 2013 |
| 229 | Alan Harper, Pleasing Women Since 2003 | 2013 |
| 230 | Justice in Star-Spangled Hot Pants | 2013 |
| 231 | Some Kind of Lesbian Zombie | 2013 |
| 232 | Mr. Walden, He Die. I Clean Room. | 2013 |
| 233 | Numero Uno Accidente Lawyer | 2013 |
| 234 | On Vodka, on Soda, on Blender, on Mixer! | 2013 |
| 235 | Tazed in the Lady Nuts | 2014 |
| 236 | Baseball. Boobs. Boobs. Baseball. | 2014 |
| 237 | Bite Me, Supreme Court | 2014 |
| 238 | Three Fingers of Cr\\u00e8me de Menthe | 2014 |
| 239 | Cab Fare and a Bottle of Penicillin | 2014 |
| 240 | How to Get Rid of Alan Harper | 2014 |
| 241 | Welcome Home, Jake | 2014 |
| 242 | West Side Story | 2014 |
| 243 | Lan mao shi zai wuding shang | 2014 |
| 244 | Lotta Delis in Little Armenia | 2014 |
| 245 | Dial 1-900-Mix-A-Lot | 2014 |
| 246 | Oh WALD-E, Good Times Ahead | 2014 |
| 247 | The Ol’ Mexican Spinach | 2014 |
| 248 | A Chic Bar in Ibiza | 2014 |
| 249 | Glamping in a Yurt | 2014 |
| 250 | Thirty-Eight, Sixty-Two, Thirty-Eight | 2014 |
| 251 | Oontz. Oontz. Oontz. | 2014 |
| 252 | Alan Shot a Little Girl | 2014 |
| 253 | Sex with an Animated Ed Asner | 2014 |
| 254 | Family, Bubl\\u00e9, Deep-Fried Turkey | 2014 |
| 255 | Bouncy, Bouncy, Bouncy, Lyndsey | 2015 |
| 256 | Here I Come, Pants! | 2015 |
| 257 | For Whom the Booty Calls | 2015 |
| 258 | A Beer-Battered Rip-Off | 2015 |
| 259 | Boompa Loved His Hookers | 2015 |
| 260 | Don’t Give a Monkey a Gun | 2015 |
| 261 | Of Course He’s Dead: Part 1 & 2 | 2015 |